What is this even for?

I hate boxes, the figurative ones. The ones we put ourselves in even when we want to be or know that we are free-spirits. The stupid boxes suck. They suck the life out of all of us and make everything monotonous. I hate papers. I hate pushing papers. I hate paper-cuts. I hate recycling paper (even though we should all be recycling, but stay with me.) I wasn’t put into this world, with this mind full of unrealistic [but possible] goals for this. I’m impractical, and impractical people can’t be ordinary.

Today is one of those days, where I repeat in my head over and over again “Is this really it?” The answer every single time is, “Hell no!” I think I reached today’s breaking point when I was told (mind the wording, not even asked) to plan the Christmas party. I’m all about Christmas, but what the hell? Is this all I’m worth, the event planner for a stupid Christmas party. I’ve got responsibilities, too. Why prioritize a Christmas party? Are you joking? You must be joking.

It’s also worth mentioning that for whatever stupid reason, I had the “responsibility” to find a picture of a flower to put on a “Certificate of Appreciation.” My co-worker and I spent the majority of last Friday on finding a stupid flower to put on a certificate. What. The. Actual. Fuck.

I’m sorry for being blunt, but I think there’s a point that we all come to and realize that we’ve really settled. It’s horrible. It’s the worst. Please do as I say and not as I do. Follow your dreams, people. I think it’s time to get the hell out of this cubicle.

8 comments on “What is this even for?

  1. Well that’s crap. This is why I am so nervous to graduate because I’m afraid I’ll accept a position just for the sake of taking a job and end up doing crap like this. I truly am sorry you have to deal with this. If you’re looking, I hope you get some interviews!

  2. I hope you’re doing better now! Gosh, I remember what I was doing on my previous job, and man, I feel you.

    • I’m fine now! Sobrang bad trip lang two weeks ago haha. The next day I found something that I think I’ll apply for because it’s more in the line of what I want to do in the future. Here’s hoping I get selected for interview!!

  3. Ay, girl, sobrang bad trip nitong post mo ah. *insert side-eye emoji here*

  4. This is a pretty regular thought that runs through my head so now the next thing for me is figuring out how to climb out of the box. I’m a pretty “safe” person who can’t just make rash decisions but, slowly, I am trying to figure out what would truly make me happy.

    Hope everything turns out well for you and you find something that won’t make you question if this is all that’s there to life.

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