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There are tons of things happening right now! I am too busy for my own good, but hey! What else is new? But I am human and I honestly can’t always keep track. Recently, I’ve started to feel the stress. I try not to let it get to me, but my gosh there’s way too much going on!

So I’m doing more moving, but instead of hosts, I’m moving IRL. Lol. It all came like a mad dash, really. Last week Shawn, Kaien and I went to go see a new place. It’s a lot bigger than where we are now. It’s a duplex, so it’s a step up from a condominium/apartment I guess. But before I could take in how amazing the new place is, we were approved; put down a security deposit; and we’re moving in next week. Talk about fast times. It’ll be a good move: closer to my parents, closer to work, closer to Kaien’s school. He’ll be much less tired in the mornings. Instead of a long drive to school, all we’ll have to do now is cross the street. I’m just glad we found a place near the neighborhood I grew up in (less than 5 minutes from my parents’ house/house I grew up in!). I am biased, but I will say it’s the last good side of town! It’s quiet, tons of families, trails, better parks, lakes on lakes on lakes, the outdoors everywhere! Totally where I need to be!

I am finally able to see some progress in my degree audit. If someone would have told me last year that I could actually make good grades while working full-time and balancing everything else, I would have laughed and called them stupid. I mean, come on! Who does this to themselves? Who works 40+ hours a week and goes to school M-F for at least 4 hours at a time. If you’re wondering, no I don’t sleep. I don’t actually know if I’m sleeping or just napping in between days. It’s whatever though, I’m used to this kind of schedule and I like this “routine.” It will all be over soon and I’ll be doing something that feels extremely meaningful and worth it — let’s hope.

If you didn’t know, I do some writing on the side. I signed on for an online magazine earlier in the year, I’m also pretty active on the freelance end (at least now). I didn’t really know what I was going to do with the rest of my time sarcasm so I, y’know, needed to fill it up. I actually like getting assigned projects that are outside of the realm that I’m used to at my 9-5 job. I never feel like I have writer’s block anymore because I’m always having to change it up. (They say if you write about the same things over and over, you reach a wall, and bam! Writer’s block!) Although, I would like to be much more on top of the projects I’m assigned. I think it’s getting to a point that my real life job is getting in the way of my other work or the other way around. I don’t know what I want.

Aaand that leads me to the final thing on my list…

I don’t know where I heard job-dead or if I made it up. I do weird shit like that so, whatever. Anyways, I wrote earlier this week that I’ve started to feel under-utilized. I honestly feel like I lose brain cells every time I walk into the office. I do love my job and being part of a program that has such an underrated impact on people’s lives, but I really don’t think I belong where I am. It’s taken me a really long time to figure it out, I mean who’s an undergrad for almost a decade? I’m starting to think that I need to put in some sort of notice that I’ll be leaving. I just need to be settled and completely okay with where I’ll end up regardless of how difficult a transition that might be. However, good timing is the biggest lie in life. It simply doesn’t exist. So, I just need to suck it up, be a big girl and do it before I completely lose myself in something I feel is becoming to mundane and not fostering any growth. I don’t want to be stuck. I don’t want to be comfortable.

What’s stressing you out?


  1. Money and traffic are stressing me out. BUT, trying not to stress about money because credit card bills can be paid off eventually anyway. GODDAMN UBER HAHA.

    I wish I could cross the street and get to work (and not pay, like, 25k up lol). They’re re-doing the roads near my place so traffic has been extra terrible for the past 3-4 months. =/

  2. My husband, my mental illness, and life in general. I’m going to see if I can use resources from my school to help me get a job.

    Also, once you are infected with the Kpop virus, you can never go back. You always go forward. It is a life long affliction. Lol I, too went through periods of not listening to Kpop, but alas, I go back, I always do.


  3. I’m so happy that you’re moving somewhere where you completely want to be, Ate Shayne! I love reading your honest thoughts too, by the way. I feel you at the whole work + school thing. I work as a freelance as well at approximately 30 hours per week and go to around 4 hours of classes everyday, and then on the way home I get stuck at around 2 hours of traffic – it’s just on some days it’s driving me nuts! Though I really love my job because it pays my tuition and I get to do it anytime at home, but still, I really miss my rest. I just wish you the best and hopefully everything settles very well soon? 🙂 I’m sure you can do it!

    • It’ll all work out in the end! We just need to keep telling ourselves that all of this jumping around and time we spend stressed out will be all worth it! You’ll be doing exactly what you want in no time! 🙂

  4. You’re one heck of a woman, you! How can you do it? Working full time and going to school on a daily basis, too! Roan only goes to school once every week, but he always complains about not having enough sleep! Are you immortal or what?!

    P.S. Ack, you’re moving! Can you please text me your new home address once you’ve moved in? You know, Christmas is just around the corner! 😉

    • I thought I had already replied to this. Maybe I’m just getting dejavu!

      I don’t think I’m immortal, maybe a zombie? I am the Walking Dead.

      I’ll send you my new address once I figure it out! Hahaha, I already forgot it. Which reminds me, I’ve got to forward all of my mail now and change my address everywhere! Send me yours too! I do all of my shopping throughout fall so I don’t spend my money all at once!!

      • Perhaps in your sleep? I get that all the time! CRAZY.

        Grabe! And you have Kaien to look after pa! You already. Hahaha!

        I’ll text you my new address now. You must have my cousin-in-law’s home address (if that was reflected in my gift last Christmas). 😉

        • Hahahaha!! I don’t even think I have the packing slip for it anymore. I put it to good use! Such good use that it’s a little beaten up now. 🙁 OOOPS! I took your gift to China through the Great Wall and back, okay! It’s been around. haha

          • Well, it makes me glad that my gift had been put to good use! I mean, it’s better to know that it’s all beaten up than knowing it’s collecting dust in your drawer! 😉

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